Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. vanzandt

    vanzandt

    Time isn't holding up, time isn't after us.
    Same as it ever was...
    ....same as it ever was.
    Same-as-it-ever-was.
     
    #14521     Nov 30, 2018
    Tom B likes this.
  2. Tom B

    Tom B

    Even though black Friday has passed, there are still deals to be had.
    [​IMG]
     
    #14522     Nov 30, 2018
    gwb-trading likes this.
  3. Arnie

    Arnie

     
    #14523     Nov 30, 2018
    Tom B and gwb-trading like this.
  4. gwb-trading

    gwb-trading

    [​IMG]
     
    #14524     Nov 30, 2018
    Tom B likes this.
  5. I was walking through a nearby mall yesterday and came upon a "Mexican Book Store."

    Never having seen one before, I went in. As I was wandering around, a clerk asked if he could help me find something.

    I asked, "Do you have a copy of Donald Trump's book about his proposed immigration policy regarding Mexicans?"

    The clerk said, "Fuck you, get out and stay out!"

    I said, "Yes, that's the one. Do you have it in paperback?"
     
    #14525     Dec 4, 2018
  6. Anyone robbing a bank on Mars will be clearly identified
    bank.jpg
     
    #14526     Dec 6, 2018
    elderado and traderob like this.
  7. gwb-trading

    gwb-trading

    [​IMG]

    If they think Rudolph was bullied wait til they hear the story about the dude that was nailed to a cross.
     
    #14527     Dec 6, 2018
    elderado and traderob like this.
  8. writing.jpg
     
    #14528     Dec 7, 2018
    elderado and Tom B like this.
  9. dog.jpg
     
    #14529     Dec 7, 2018
    elderado likes this.
  10. A view of the world in which we live today - - -

    8:00 am- I made a snowman.

    8:15- A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

    8:30- So, I made a snow woman.

    8:45- My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest, saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

    9:00- The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead.

    9:15- The transgender ma... wom... er, person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

    9:25- The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures.

    9:30- I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

    9:35- The Muslim guy across the road demands the snow woman wear a burka.

    9:40- The police arrive saying someone has been offended

    9:45- The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a subservient domestic role.

    9:50- The city equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

    10:00- TV news crew from the ABC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs?" and am now being called a sexist

    11:00- I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic, sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

    11:10- I am asked if I have any accomplices. My children are taken by social services.

    11:30- Far left protesters, offended by everything, are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded.

    Moral:- There is no moral to this story. It's just a view of the world in which we live today, and it is only getting worse.
     
    #14530     Dec 7, 2018
    elderado likes this.