Jokes 2

New Zealand Hooker


<img src="http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=1742750"/>

 

Men's room in (I think) Germany:


<img src="http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=1742757"/>

 

I thought this was cute. Inventive kids...


<img src="http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=1742760"/>

 

Starbucks has fired its chief executive, Jim Donald. This begs the question: where does someone that gets fired from Starbucks kill time during the day?

 

The man who owns Jerry Garcia's house is selling the legend’s kitchen sink, or as Jerry called it, his ‘bong water refilling station’.

 

A Florida teenager who has been hiccuping for five weeks straight has finally stopped. The library where she was found bludgeoned to death will be closed pending an investigation

 

What is the tide comes in, and they can't get him out? Explain that to the detectives.

 

Soemtimes, Getting Drunk Is Necessary

A guy walks into a bar and orders a shot of whisky. He gulps it down and peeks into his shirt pocket. He orders another shot of whisky, gulps it down and peeks into his short pocket. He orders a third shot and does the same thing. After the sixth shot, he asks the bartender for the bill, pays and starts to walk out.

Curiosity gets the better of the bartender and he says to the guy, "Excuse me, but I noticed that every time you drank a shot, you kept looking into your pocket. I was wondering what's in your pocket."

The guy sighs deeply and slurs, "Well, I have a picture of my wife in my pocket. I keep drinking until she starts to look good..."

 

What did the mongoloid say to his dog?

‘Down, Syndrome!’

 

A spastic goes to an ice cream van. The man in the van asks him what flavour he’d like. ‘Doesn’t matter, I’m just going to drop the fucker anyway.’