Media analyst Mark Dice offers random people their choice of a Hershey chocolate bar or a 10 oz silver bar (Worth $150) in an experiment. You have to see what happened next!And remember, these are the people who are going to be voting this year. It does make you wonder. https://www.youtube.com/embed/bYhTFz_SGw0
-Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected? -Take my advice............ I'm not using it. -I hate it when people use big words just to make themselves sound perspicacious. -Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they're at home when you wish they were. -Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer. -I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust. -Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool. -I'll bet you $4,567 you can't guess how much I owe my bookie. -Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. -If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants. -A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. -Ever stop to think and forget to start again? -My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver's test--the other two guys managed to jump out of her way. -There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking. -Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking. -Give me ambiguity or give me something else. -He who laughs last thinks slowest. -Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly? -Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do-it-yourself type. -I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one. -Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. -The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don't have to mow it. -I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people who annoy me. -I was going to wear my camouflage shirt today, but I couldn't find it. -If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. -If tomatoes are technically a fruit, is ketchup a smoothie? -Money is the root of all wealth.
SELF EXAMINATION FOR ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE....It takes less than 15 seconds.. If you are over 55 yrs old, you SHOULD take this Alzheimer's Test How fast can you guess these words and fill-in the blanks? 1. _ _NDOM 2. F_ _K 3. P_N_S 4. PU_S_ 5. S_X 6. BOO_S Answers: 1. RANDOM 2. FORK 3. PANTS 4. PULSE 5. SIX 6. BOOKS You got all 6 wrong...didn't you? You do NOT have Alzheimer's. You are a pervert.
Jesse Jackson's NewestStaffer. You can't make up stuff better than this! Mel Reynolds Jesse Jacksonhas added former Chicago Congressman Mel Reynolds to Rainbow/PUSH Coalition's payroll.. Reynolds was among the 176 criminals excused in President Clinton's last-minute clemency forgiveness spree. Reynolds received a commutation of his sixandahalfyear federal sentence for 15 convictions of wire fraud, bank fraud, and lies to the Federal Election Commission. He is more notorious, however, for concurrently serving five years for sleeping with an underage campaign volunteer. This is a first in American politics: An ex-congressman who had sex with a subordinate. Then won clemency from a president who had sex with a subordinate. Then was hired by a clergyman who had sex with a subordinate! His new job? Ready for this? YOUTH COUNSELOR WHAT KIND OF COUNTRY ARE WE IN?
Comments from Kulula Airlines flight crews: On flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants." On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have." "There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane." "Thank you for flying Kulula. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride." As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Durban Airport, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!" After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in the Karoo, a flight attendant on a flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as heck everything has shifted." From a Kulula employee: "Welcome aboard Kulula 271 to Port Elizabeth. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt, and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised." "In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favourite." "Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Kulula Airlines." "Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments." "As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses." And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Kulula Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!" Heard on Kulula 255 just after a very hard landing in Cape Town: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt." Overheard on a Kulula flight into Cape Town, on a particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain really had to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the flight attendant said, "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Mother City. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!" Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal." An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight, he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline." He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had got off, except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Why, no Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or were we shot down?"
‘OLD’ IS WHEN… Your wife says, ‘Let’s go upstairs and make love,’ and you answer, ‘Pick one; I can’t do both!’ ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you’re barefoot. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… People no longer view you as a hypochondriac. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… ‘Getting lucky’ means you find your car in the parking lot. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… An ‘all nighter’ means not getting up to use the bathroom. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… Your knees buckle, and your belt won’t. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… You can’t remember the last time you lay on the floor to watch TV. ‘OLD’ IS WHEN… In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.