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One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. ''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks." Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
A student played high school football in Detroit . He was a great running back, but a really poor student. At graduation, he didn't have enough credits. But he was a great football star and the students held a rally and demanded the principal give him his diploma anyway. They were so insistent that the principal agreed if Dwayne could answer one question correctly, he would give him his diploma. The one-question test was held in the auditorium and all the students packed the place. It was standing room only. The principal was on the stage and told him to come up. The principal had the diploma in his hand and said, "Dwayne, if you can answer this question correctly I'll give you your diploma." Dwayne said he was ready and the principal asked him the question. "Dwayne," he said, "How much is three times seven?" Dwayne looked up at the ceiling and the down at his shoes, pondering the question. The other students began chanting, "Graduate him anyway! Graduate him anyway!" Then, Dwayne held up his hand and the auditorium became silent. He said, "I think... I know the answer . Three times seven is twenty-one." A hush fell over the auditorium and all the other students began another chant... "Give him another chance!... Give him another chance!"