Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. Lucrum

    Lucrum

    Ye Can't Fool a Scottish Caddy


    During his golfing vacation at Martha's Vineyard - President Obama
    had been slicing off the tee on every hole.

    He asks his Scottish caddy if he has noticed any obvious reasons for
    his poor tee shots, to which the caddy replies:

    "Aye, there's a piece of shyt on the end of yer driver. "

    The President picks up his driver and cleans the club face, at which
    point the caddy says:

    "No, the other end."
     
    #11401     Feb 1, 2013
  2. :D

    I would have changed one part of that joke.

    "During his golfing vacation at Martha's Vineyard - President O'bama"
     
    #11402     Feb 1, 2013
  3. fhl

    fhl

    The Huffington Post is a great read. Filled with interesting stuff.

    Just read a fascinating piece there on the 9 greatest single digit numbers of all time.
     
    #11403     Feb 1, 2013
  4. fhl

    fhl

    That 1 trillion dollar coin. lol

    Can't ya just see someone asking "do you have two 500 billions for a trillion?"
     
    #11404     Feb 1, 2013
  5. fhl

    fhl

    by the way. I'd like to make an important announcement.

    I'm thinking of retiring.

    After all, it's almost ten pm here in London.
     
    #11405     Feb 1, 2013
  6. Humpy

    Humpy

    Whose head would you like to see on the Trillion dollar coin ?

    Hows about Bush or Odumbo - they wasted most of it on ... I forget what.
     
    #11406     Feb 2, 2013
  7. fhl

    fhl

    You know, if i had some ham, i'd have some ham and eggs for breakfast this morning. If I had some eggs.
     
    #11407     Feb 2, 2013
  8. fhl

    fhl

    I had some really great news for my family and so i thought i would share it here, too.

    My therapist says that i only need two more sessions and then i can have sharp objects again!
     
    #11408     Feb 3, 2013
  9. I went to see a therapist recently. I told him about my obsessive compulsive disorder, severe depression, claustrophobia, insomnia, attention deficit disorder, agoraphobia and I've been posting my opinions on ET forums


    He said, "Have you ever considered suicide?"

    Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's some pretty bad advice.:cool:
     
    #11409     Feb 3, 2013
  10. In order to cure my virulent racism, my therapist asked me to imagine that the shoe was on the other foot.

    I had an image of one leg with two shoes on it and one without.

    It didn't help much.
     
    #11410     Feb 3, 2013