I was washing the car yesterday when my annoying neighbour piped up, "You can clean mine next!" "Ha hahahahaha!" I laughed. Gesus, it's bad enough I have to bang his wife for him.
I heard BO signed a four year contract with Comedy Central starting next January. They expect almost 100% of population to watch it: 50% will love it, 50% will laugh it.
I don't know why some people are campaigning for same-sex marriage. Once you're married, the sex is always the same.
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Speaking Of ABOs A conservative, a liberal and a moderate go into a bar. The barman looks up and says: "Hi Mitt!"
I waited till I was married before having sex with the wife. I kind of ran out of excuses after that.
For 12 years I've had tinnitus but it's disappeared today. Coincidentally my wife has just run off with the neighbour...