Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. Italian divers searching the stricken cruise ship have found two Polacks at the bar.

    They've told the divers to fuck off, drinks are included..
     
    #10091     Jan 18, 2012
  2. Radio transcript:


    Overheard on the ships radio as the Costa sailed closer to the shore and the captain saw his family:


    Maaaaama - I'm - a Here!
    Mam -- ama - heera!
    Mama Mia!
    Mama!!!
     
    #10092     Jan 18, 2012
  3. Subject: Occupy PGA Tour


    I am a member of golf's 99%.

    I play golf, but have not yet made it to the professional level!! I have played the game for over 40 years, but have not really put in the practice time and study to be the best. I also probably do not have the skills to really get there either. However, I now feel that I should be paid by the successful professionals for trying.
    It isn't fair that those players who have worked harder, have studied the game, have better equipment and are stronger and more skilled should make all that money. Oh sure, they have their charities that they give millions of dollars to, but I am sure that they write all that off on their tax returns to reduce paying their fair share. Is that fair?

    They should pay for my golf, buy me new equipment and pay me some of their winnings. The whole system should be changed to accommodate people like me!! Let's occupy a golf course and demand that those who are better at what they do pay for us who aren't as good. Whining should get us something, like media attention and sympathy from liberals!!

    Anyone else want to join me!!
     
    #10093     Jan 18, 2012
  4. Whoa! I got a hair cut today. That's good!


    <iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/KP2h1gJcsHU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
     
    #10094     Jan 18, 2012
  5. This Joke has been found in violation of H.R. 3261, S.O.P.A and has been removed. â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533; â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533; â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533; â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533; â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;â&#65533;&#65533;
     
    #10095     Jan 18, 2012
  6. Under SOPA, you could get 5 years for uploading a Michael Jackson song. One year more than the doctor who killed him.
     
    #10096     Jan 18, 2012
  7. With Wikipedia down, are there any other sites where someone can masturbate to a long-winded description of porn?

    Asking for a friend.....:D
     
    #10097     Jan 18, 2012
  8. My favorite MJ, most people never recogniz this song.

    <iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/mLxs1l3l4HE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
     
    #10098     Jan 18, 2012
  9. Humpy

    Humpy

    If you are short of a few $s and crap at golf then go caddying
     
    #10099     Jan 19, 2012
  10. When I think back
    On all the crap I learned in high school
    It's a wonder
    I can think at all
    And though my lack of education
    Hasn't hurt me none
    I can read the writing on the wall

    Kodachrome
    They give us those nice bright colors
    They give us the greens of summers
    Makes you think all the world's
    a sunny day
    I got a N**** camera
    I love to take a photograph
    So mama don't take my Kodachrome away

    If you took all the girls I knew
    When I was single
    And brought them all together
    for one night
    I know they'd never match
    my sweet imagination
    Everything looks worse
    in black and white




    Mama's not taking Mr. Paul Simon's Kidachrome away; the US Bankruptcy court is!
     
    #10100     Jan 19, 2012