I Have Done It Again

Discussion in 'Psychology' started by Compulsive, May 25, 2007.

  1. :confused:

    Long story, short story

    As I look back at my trading career, there is a pattern that is compulsive. I started trading in 1992, when back then I would wait for my weekly charts to come on Mondays and the Investors Daily every morning and manually updated the futures by hand. I started with a $5,000 account and back then I was paing $45 RT. In 6 months the account had gone up to $85,000. Would buy or sell 1-2 contracts and held it until I got stopped out or until it reach my target, sometimes as long as 3 months. I finally had found my vehicle towards retirement. Then my broker, introduce me to "Day Trading"

    Why wait to make $1500 or $3000 or $5000 or what ever it was and it took weeks and even months to make while one could trade 10-20 contracts and take smaller profits of $100-200 per contract. It made sense. And so with that idea, got set up will real time (back then with E Signal, was paying $600 a month for real time and $100 a month for charts...things have change since then), in less than 3 days, the account had drop to $35,000. :eek:

    I was emotional F%$#k!

    Out of desperation trying to get my money back and make profits, within 2 months the account stood at $2,500.

    2 years later in 1994, I tried again with $5,000, no day trading ...follow my rules, account grew to $15,000 in 3 months and then it was a disaster In 1999 I tried again with another $10,000, again long term trading, the account grew to $39,500 in 5 months and then like the same pattern...lost 3/4 of it. Tried again in 2003 with a $10,000 account, long term trading and lasted 1 year, like a roller coaster it eventually came to an end.

    Then In November 2006, I plung $25,000 and this time, I went back to day trading, commish was $3.75 rt, was going to trade the eminis Russell, had a plan, read the Discipline Trader, By Mark Douglas...mentally prepared myself. Had a set of rules too follow, no exucses allowed.

    I started day trading after all the winter holidays, and so in Jan 05 2007, took the $25k and it stood at $235,000 by Feb 20 2007. But it was not easy, it was very stressfull. There were time that I would be up in one day $65,000 and the next day down $85,000. Crazy train it was and I could feel the pressure that this could not last very long. And so from March 01 to April 27, 2007 it was like having hemorrhoids everyday, eventually the bottom fell out and then the account stood at $4,950.00.

    I really felt very suicidal, very sick, vomiting and a family to support. I checked in to see a psychologist. and to the recommendation of the therapsit, I am attenting GA meeting, Gamblers Anonymous. I have met 2 other traders in my meeting, there is one dude that we have become friends, but this man took a $50k account to $2.5 million in less then 10 months and lost it all!
    :eek: :eek: :eek:

    So I ask, if 97% of traders do not make it, then surely this trading is some type of gambling and there is a fine line, this invisible line between a professional gambler and a compulsive gambler. Shit, if the author of The Disciple Trader lost everything and had to file for banckruptcy, he was gambling.

    As I look back, when I follow my plans, there is money to be made, but after awhile, I do not stick with my rules and eventually it gets crazy


    I fit the above profile to a "T"

    The GA meetings tell me that I will no longer be able to trade again. I have placed my family in a financial stressful position that our savings is gone. Spouse ready to bolt with the children, she can't take this no more. I am certainly don't want any pity from anybody, but I keep asking, what causes me to do this?
  2. You should be able to look back on your trading see what works and what doesn't and stick to what works.

    The reason that you look for other setups other than your long term setup is because you're bored.

    Do what you have been doing long-term with most of your money and try day trading with 5k? 1 contract? Just don't let yourself get bored while you wait for the longer-term swings.
  3. monee


    Don't know your strategy but chances are you are holding on to losers too long.

    The way to tell is how many of your big winners were big losers first.

    2nd point is if you were making that much money so fast the leverage must have been insane.

    Something must change.

    Either smaller position size and/or limit the daily/weekly/monthly
    permitted loss.

    Just my thoughts.
  4. bluud


    You do not separate your profits from your account.

    If for every dollar you made you took it out of your account and put it into a simple but more secure account (I mean a savings bank account), most of you would not have the problems you have.
  5. bluud


    ... My previous post is not only true about trading but all other business, I know alot of people who have made massive amounts of money in some business but have lost them later ...

    ... this is because humans assume if one thing has occurred once or twice it will occur again, humans have been thought to and like to think in if and then statements ... this includes the teaching of religions in case of if you do this such and so will happen ... or physics and science .... which none is true ... there is no if then in this universe cause the universe itself is not a result of a if then ... it is all probability you can only say if you do this there is 60% chance of this happening and if you do this AND this there is 70% of this happening ... and there is only a 55% chance of the above statements being valid ... and so on ...
  6. One day I was trading some oil futures and then went on vacation for a while. I forgot to close out a few contracts. Got back home a month later and there were oil drums all over my lawn.
  7. bluud


    even if you want to invest back everything you have made into the business you are doing ... I believe it should not be more than 50% of the profit ... unless you are willing to loose it all for a small chance of some greater amount of wealth ...
  8. Here is a simple advice for you.

    Never trade again.
  9. nkhoi

    nkhoi Moderator

    sorry for you loss but how did you that again? :)
  10. Are you saying Mark Douglas, the trading shrink, had to file bankruptcy?
    #10     May 25, 2007