Haven't we done this before? Here are a few that I'm sure haven't been taken: The SlamBamThankYouMam Fund The Down The Tubes Fund The Up Your's Fund Swindler Fund Snake Charmer Fund The Barnie Fund The E. F. Hutton Fund The Dollars to Dimes Fund The Inexperienced Fund The Venezuela Fund The Deep Water Fund
Just avoid using the words "Capital", "Partners", "Fund" and anything from Greek or Roman mythology and you should be fine.
"The Actually Hedged Fund" "The Plunge Protection Team (BVI)" "Seeking Beta" "Madoff Stole Our Auditor" "V. Niederhoffer Comeback Fund"
Hummm. I was drunk when I posted... here's the info on LaForza Whatever happened to the Italians' answer to the SUV? There was a day when dinosaurs roamed the earth. They were shod with oversized tires to proclaim to the world that no terrain would best them. They sported protective gear for their faces and tails so their delicate parts would not be damaged by trees or rocks. And if they, god forbid, ever got a speck of dirt on them, their owners would polish these $40,000 steeds to a mirror finish. Yes, children, there was a day when SUVs ruled the earth. The golden age of the SUV lasted from the introduction of the Ford Explorer in 1990 until the great oil run-up of 2005-2008, and the subsequent economic meltdown. This brought about such a dramatic automotive pendulum swing that 10-year old Chevrolet Metros were selling for nearly the prices they brought when they were new... and dealers couldn't give away SUVs. It was a harbinger of things to come--but when things were good, everybody wanted in. Even before this golden age, many vehicle builders saw the opportunity in what would become the SUV segment. There were International Scouts and Land Rovers and Toyota Land Cruisers and Chevrolet Suburbans and Ford Broncos and Suzuki SJs, not to mention a number of Willys Jeep models. Ranging from tiny to enormous, the one thing these vehicles had in common was their utility. So little attention was paid to luxury appointments that many of them were available with rattling and squeaking bolt-on roof sections, washable floors, and metal dashboards. These rugged vehicles began to evolve, slowly at first. England's Land Rover introduced the Range Rover, which became a luxury vehicle by the 1980s. Germany's Mercedes-Benz offered a military vehicle through its truck division that also could be had in civilized versions as well. And Jeep's ancient Grand Wagoneer also attained some luxury touches by the mid-1980s. Giulio Malvino, son-in-law to one of the founders of Carrozzeria Fissore, founded Rayton Fissore in Cherasco, Italy, just as his family's coachbuilder was closing its doors. Rayton Fissore specialized in producing bodies for trucks, but in the early 1980s, the concept of their own vehicle emerged. To style this new "luxury SUV," Tom Tjaarda was called in. Son of the Lincoln Zephyr designer John Tjaarda, Tom worked with Ghia, Pininfarina, and ItalDesign, where he helped sculpt vehicles ranging from the Lancia Y10 to the deTomaso Pantera. By 1984, Tjaarda launched his own design studio in Italy. Commercial vehicle manufacturer IVECO supplied the chassis from its 40-10 four-wheel-drive military vehicle. Lancia and Alfa Romeo gasoline engines provided the power. Tjaarda pulled from various parts bins, including headlights from the Fiat Regata, taillights from the Citroen BX, and various other parts from the Lancia Delta--wrapping the whole thing in an 18-gauge steel body. Tjaarda's SUV was unveiled at the 1985 Turin motor show as the Rayton Fissore Magnum. The Magnum name was quite fitting, as this 15-foot-long truck towered six-and-a-half feet tall, stretched over seven feet wide, and tipped the scales at nearly 5,000 pounds. Production began almost immediately. Magnums found their way into the Carabinieri, where they protected the streets of Italy for years. Aside from law enforcement, the Magnum wasn't popular in Europe where roads were narrow and gasoline was expensive. The addition of an optional VM Motori diesel engine did not help matters much, and production only reached about 200 units a year. Ever the capitalists, Americans took one look at the Magnum and saw a chance to make money foisting this vehicle on the North American public. Marketed as the Laforza, the Magnum was brought to the Los Angeles Auto Show in January 1989. In order to make it more palatable to American buyers (and to get the vehicle through stringent American emissions regulations), the Italian powertrain was replaced with the ubiquitous Ford pushrod V8. The fuel-injected 302cid (4,942cc) engine was mated to Ford's four-speed automatic overdrive transmission and the New Process 229 full-time four-wheel-drive transfer case. Sales of the Laforza never took off in the United States either. Despite the love of such large vehicles and no fewer than three companies standing behind the project, sales never amounted to more than a trickle before the American importer closed its doors in August 1990. Monster Motorsports, famous for their V8-engined Mazda Miatas, purchased some of the assets of the failed Laforza company and began importing unfinished Laforzas in the mid-1990s. They installed engines in their small plant in California, even adding a Kenne Bell supercharger as optional equipment. After selling the initial allotment of 50 Laforzas, the company made a deal with Magnum's Saudi Arabian investors to acquire more unfinished SUVs. Monster was absorbed by Celebrity Network in 1997, and the new company was renamed Laforza Automobiles. Laforza Automobiles took over both sales and manufacturing (through their Italian counterpart Laforza International) at the end of the decade. While Ford-powered Laforzas continued, they were eventually replaced by a few models with the 6.0L OHV V8 mated to a Hydra-Matic 4L65-E four-speed automatic transmission, supplied by General Motors. The new company even went so far as to market the vehicle with armor plating, badging it as the Laforza Magnum PSV (Personal Security Vehicle). But starting at $100,000 (not including the armor plating), the Laforza remained a rare sight. The end eventually came in 2003 when Laforza Automobiles filed for bankruptcy. Occasionally, one of these dinosaurs comes up for sale. Prices have fallen from their initial $50,000 (in 1989) range to well below $10,000 today. While the skin-and-bones dinosaurs left us pockets of oil around the world, this steel-bodied dinosaur only uses petroleum products like it's the 1980s all over again. Spotting a Laforza today is rarer than finding an intact Tyrannosaurs skeleton fossil. Those of us dedicated automotive paleontologists are left to uncover these extinct species of a bygone era to educate future generations. "Gather around, children...while I tell you the tale of the gas-guzzling SUVs...... >>>> End of conversation! It's LAFORZA INVESTMENTS! I will give you ten days to copyright this name after that I may take it as successor to stonedinvesting which is trademarked for paper newsletters... (ahhh the old days) ~stoney