"He did 3 tours in 'Nam...... I was in Corpus Christi on business a month ago. I had this eight foot tall Asian waiter, which made me curious. I asked him his name. Sure enough it's Ho Tran Brasky!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! HAHAHAHAHHA!
"Did I ever tell you about the time he taught his son how to drive? He did it by entering him in the Indy 500. The kid wrecked and died. Brasky said it would've happened sometime." LOLOLOL!!
Salesman #1: Hey... do you guys know a fella by the name of Bill Brasky? Salesman #2: Bill Brasky! Salesman #3: Best damn snowmobile salesman there ever was! Salesman #1: He uses Old Spice aftershave as nasal spray! Salesman #2: He fashions graven images from frozen seawater! Salesman #3: He brushes his teeth with a meat cleaver and rock salt! Salesman #1: This one time, Brasky burned a CD with nothing but the sounds of his bowel movements and the screams of his manservants. It went triple platinum within the month. Salesman #2: He owns the PAX network. Salesman #3: He thought "The Princess Diaries" was both "charming" and "sweet depiction of one girl's emergence from youth into womanhood". Salesman #1: He made Styx BITE IT! Salesman #2: They say he bleeds peppermint vodka. Salesman #3: Did I ever tell ya about the time that Brasky and I took a hot air balloon trip over Los Angeles? Brasky brings an atomic bomb and drops it on the city! Then, he looks at me and says, "It would have happened sooner or later." Salesman #1: The movie "Deliverance" was based on Brasky's experiences as a kindergarden teacher. Salesman #2: His memoirs are tattooed on Ruth Buzzi! Salesman #3: He's producing Battlefield Earth 2! Salesman #1: He recieves radio messages from Mars on his scrotum! Salesman #2: His big toe is holding up Australia! Salesman #3: He took The Blair Witch to his senior prom! Salesman #1: He makes N'Sync keep Chris! Salesman #2: He invented "The Cleveland Steamer"! Salesman #3: Most people don't know this, but Bill Brasky has children! This one time, he was banging a hooker and wouldn't ya know it, his semen shoots straight through her tailbone, up through the ceiling and into the sky where it hit a plane! Nine months later, every woman on that plane had Brasky's children! [takes a drink] When they tried to get child support... he paid it every month. Salesman #1: To Bill Brasky! Salesman #2 & #3: To Bill Brasky! Salesman #1: His pubic hair was woven into the Sir Lankan flag! Salesman #2: His favorite actor is Greg Kinnear! Salesman #3: His middle name is Julian! Salesman #1: He uses live elk for toilet paper! Salesman #2: His cover version of Limp Bizkit's "My Way" appeared on the soundtrack for "Titanic". The pope himself thought the song crackled with energy but he didn't like the sound of burning preschoolers in the background! [Woman #1 comes over.] Woman #1: Excuse me. Could you gentlemen please quiet down a bit? We're trying to have a birthday party for my son. Salesman #3: Yank off, sister! And get us some more complimentary caramel corn! [She leaves.] Salesman #1: Did I ever tell you boys about the time that Bill Brasky wanted a World Series ring? Wouldn't ya know it, but Brasky kills the entire starting lineup of the 1998 New York Yankees! All except Clay Bellinger. They beat The Atlanta Braves in four games. Brasky was the MVP. Salesman #2: He pisses farm fresh orange juice! Salesman #3: He makes his grandchildren call him "The Anal Astrologist". Salesman #1: His favorite contestant on Survivor is Teresa. Salesman #2: To Bill Brasky! Salesman #1 & #3: To Bill Brasky! He pisses farm fresh orange juice!!! lol