Wait a minute, so you lost 2 million dollars and falsified trading documents in the process? Just be glad you are still a free man. Thats felony fraud and racketeering. State attorney generals have busted people for alot less. Don't take this the wrong way, but frankly I'm surprised the other parties haven't taken criminal/civil action against you. Just some honest advice. I'd make sure everything legally is cleared up before worrying about anything else.
Hi Lundy, I truly hope your getting professional help (psychologist, psycho-therapist, ect) from someone that deals with individuals like yourself. Simply, to come public with your past is a start. You still need help. Or at least see someone (psychologist, psycho-therapist, ect) that tells you your on the right track in your recovery. I once had a friend that was an alcholic and a chronic liar. He came forth with his lies and finally admitted he had a drinking problem...but only after hitting rock bottom (lost the wife, kids, house, job...living out of his car). However, he continue with his ways in many clandestine ways while only admitting things to strangers. Guess what...he would find out later he hadn't hit rock bottom and things got worst. My point is this...things didn't get better...his life didn't improve...until he got professional help. That same professional help truly expose him for what he was. Then he was forced to expose himself and apologize to all his loved ones, friends, business partners... a lot tougher then telling all to a bunch of annonymous posters at EliteTrader.com Am I being critical...no way. Do I feel sorry for you...no way. Do I think your looking for pity...no way. Lundy...I don't know you. Therefore, I don't know if your are currently getting professional help and this "revealing" process to the ET board is part of that process suggested by that professional. Simply, if your not getting professional help... you have a long ways to go. By the way, I highly recommend you stay away from the markets while your trying to discover or re-discover yourself. Besides myself...I'm sure a few here have seen personally worst situations than your story via close relationships with individuals as yourself. Once again...get professional help...stay away from the markets and you'll be able to truly start your life. By the way...that close friend that was an alcholic that admitted such while at rock bottom...not knowing it was going to get worst... he was hanging out at the bars (not drinking anymore), hanging out with the same individuals that gave him the impression... things will be ok...no problem...nothing to sweat over...it'll be alright...keep trying...you'll succeed... while not giving him any real solutions. Thus, my final words to you. Stop hanging out at this board. You've told your story...now go get help...real help. P.S. Your former business partners can still bring criminal charges or drag you through civil court... regardless if they have an understanding ear right now because they can change their minds anytime for any reason. Therefore...I also advise you to get some advise from a lawyer. Remember...it still can get worst and has a high probability it will due to the fact about the amount of money your talking about. Lundy, stay away from the markets and stay away from this board and others like it. You need professional help. Good luck and I wish you the best. NihabaAshi
#1. I never said it was in the family. #2. I never said I wasn't being pursued legally. Really though, I deserve to go to prison for it, and I don't see prison as my biggest concern. What I feel in my heart is my big concern, and how I've abused those who trusted me. Because of it, I already live in the prison of a very hard shelled heart.
Nihabasahi, I'd agree with you but theres one part of the story that is still left. I HAVE to pay these people back. I don't feel like the markets, this board, or any place or people have anything to do with my problem. This problem is about me. I'm not an alchoholic. I'm most certainly not addicted to the market or trading. What I am is a pretender. Therefore I'm coming forward, saying who I am, and how I've pretended. I am also developing a plan to work hard and pay these people back. Part of that plan may include allocating funds to trading. Edit: In different aspects of my life related to this and other incidents, I am coming forward and admitting to who I am, and how I have pretended. That doesn't mean I'm quitting all prior activity.
I dont really have a whole lot to say on this type of situation...never been in it or seen it firsthand...however, one thought struck me... Maybe going to prison would help you...offer you some way to feel that you were atoning. To satisfy the moral debt we incur to society when we violate laws and social rules. I just know that when people get away with things sometimes, without truly 'paying up', sometimes they carry the guilt in a more debilitating way in the future. At any rate, thanks for the openness, we can all learn a bit from someone who has walked your road, and Good Luck rehabilitating yourself. Oh yeah, one last thought: alcoholics shouldnt become bartenders, gambling addicts shouldnt become blackjack dealers, maybe a trading addict/problem trader, shouldnt become anything that continues to deal with the markets. Hard as that may be given your attraction to them, give it some real thought there.
You just don't get it...do you? Based on your story...you have similar problems as any alcholic or liar...that's the reason why I made the analogy. Lundy...go get help. Your posted story is almost meaningless to your real recovery...something your unable to see right now. Your accomplishing nothing so far unless your getting professional help. Stay away from the markets. NihabaAshi
I am a chronic liar. Thats my problem Nihaba. Do you mean gambler? I'm a little confused by your posts. You don't fully know my situation, but you are boldly telling me what to do. I certainly listen to all advice and comments but I always act freely. So thanks for your advice.
Lundy, If I have any idea (not advice) for you is that you might think about select an ET member that have style closely match your own and then pay him/her to learn the rope.I will pay P2 to learn if I can afford him.