I have a second thought about the trading journal thing, trading should be private and uninfluenced. Therefore, I will no longer update this thread.
Delusion: A belief that is firmly maintained despite being contradicted by generally accepted reality or rational argument. You have a delusion that you are capable of successful trading in your current state. You have been defending your delusion by alternatively ignoring, rejecting, and now completely abandoning the plethora of rational feedback you've gotten by numerous different individuals, not to mention that substantial evidence provided by your consistently losing trade history up to present day. For whatever reason, you are choosing to believe in this false idea instead of the truth. Maybe you will be able to look back and see that some day, when the consequences of your foolishness get large enough to force you to accept reality. Or maybe not. I agree with your decision to close this journal. There's nothing edifying about watching another trader fall into this pitfall and hurt himself. And we already have so many previous examples of this on the site. I feel sympathy for your plight, but you've clearly shown that there isn't anything the rest of us on this forum can do for you at this point. Hope you are able to grow in humility and wisdom from this experience after it's conclusion. -llIHeroic
Sorry to hear that you will no longer update this thread. But I will leave this in case you come back to read. No because I want to be condescending or to kick a man when he is down, but because I (and I am betting most of the guys posting in this thread) have been there. Just look at Friday vs Monday: vs Over the weekend you went from knowing trend following wasn't for you, to it being one of three types of trades you will take. vs These are the kind of things that are in a good trading plan. If your plan changes that drastically, you should forward test the new plan. My guess is that if you write down each day a list of things that you must no longer do, you will find that within a week you will also decide that one of those things is the key to success. It won't be, but you will convince yourself that it is. Why would I say something like this to a stranger on the internet? Because I did the same stupid shit. You are grasping, floundering and drowning. That is not all in your mind. When someone is drowning, do you shout at them to start swimming? Of course not, if they could swim they wouldn't be drowning. You throw them something to help them keep their head above water. And you also might remind them how reckless they were to be in water over their head without knowing how to swim in the first place. There are a lot of posts in this thread doing just that. Don't think you are drowning? During trading today did you feel that sick, frustrated anger and helpless fear? Did you keep trading anyway, just knowing that you could make something happen and pull out a winning day? And maybe you did pull it out for today...which only makes things worse. You will never learn to trade while trying to make money. Trading is unlike any other pursuit you have attempted. In most of our lives, we bust our ass and make things happen. That only trains us for failure in trading. If at anytime during market hours you start to feel like you are working, or have a need to make something happen...stop trading! The ass busting and work happen while the markets are closed. You will never make something happen while trading. You are a tiny speck in the ocean and will only ever be swept along for the ride. The only choice you have is when to get in and out of the water, and you better be swimming with the current when you jump in. Get your head above water and get in control, or drown.
Hurricane, I wanted to point something out to you, about the psychology of it all. You see how you have posted your losing trades in red text? Meanwhile, you post your winning trades in black text, which blends in with everything else. They do not stand out. All we see at first glance are the blaring losers, but you give no attention to the winners with a different color. Say, violent green. Yes, violent green! lol. Anyhoo, the point is that we all always seem to focus on the negatives, and do not seem to peer enough into the positives.
"You are a tiny speck in the ocean and will only ever be swept along for the ride. The only choice you have is when to get in and out of the water, and you better be swimming with the current when you jump in." This is brilliantly put.