A moderator's wish is my command. Please note the five additions as posted in my journal on New Year's Eve. Image Creation This is primarily geared for the lurker who has finally mustered up enough courage to submit his/her make-or-break first post. Initial impressions are critical and will determine whether he is accepted (albeit with newbie status) into the fold or shot down in flames. Even worse, he could be ignored and suffer the ignominious fate of entering the "One-Post-Thread Hall of Shame". Image Enhancement For the ET member who for some reason has blown it, and feels there would be less work correcting his image than restarting with a new alias. Rescue I For those sticky situations where you've inadvertently pissed off someone like daniel_m or Cesko. My sophistry and humor will assuage their savage breasts and for an extra fee I'll get you on their buddy list. Rescue II Whether you get way over your head in an argument with darkhorse, or have all the logical flaws in your trading strategy pointed out by Magna - if there's an elegant and honorable retreat, I'll find it. Crisis Management Has your 23-month old blockbuster hit trading journal been finally exposed as a "cut and paste job" from a 15-minute-delayed simulator? Even worse, an edited, cut and paste job? I will show you how to capitalize on this fiasco and turn it to your advantage. Alias Management I For the folks who want to avoid paying Baron advertising fees, remember that the "Has anyone heard about XXXXX ?" post by a two-hour-old Junior Member doesn't cut it anymore. Using Senior and Elite Member aliases that I have painstakingly nurtured, I will shamelessly promote your product without anyone the wiser. Alias Management II My methods will show you how to avoid that embarrassing "forgot to log out" gaffe which has brought many a great thread to a premature end. Also learn how to utilize your multiple aliases for good cop, bad cop routines, and character assassination. Proxy Posting Having a bad run? A telltale sign is not posting for a few weeks. Don't let others know - I'll post for you at regular intervals. Remember, even an innocuous "" is better than the inevitable rumors and quiet snickering. Post and Page View Enhancement There's nothing more ego-deflating than when the post that took you 5 hours to write only gets 1 reply and 23 page views. Let my loquacious aliases inflate your thread to Journal proportions while my hyperactive right index finger clicks the Refresh icon and the page views into the low 5 digits you deserve. Member Status Enhancement Embarrassed that you're still a Junior Member with 3 posts who registered in May, 1999? Envious of nitro, rs7 and the other 4-digit Elite Members? I have a computer-generated set of specially tailored posts that is guaranteed to catapult you into chasinfla territory within 3 months. Surrogate Posting As a newer member, have you ever tried inquiring about broker X or platform Y? Instead of helpful replies, you are immediately branded a spammer and hounded from the thread with your question still unanswered. Avoid this unnecessary molestation by channeling your queries through one of my many longstanding and respectable aliases. Preventive Maintenance Is your thread or journal continually besieged by hordes of critics, stalkers and other undesirables. As an initial step, I will review the possible source of these attacks and suggest appropriate changes to the post content and philosophy. Failing that, I will fend off these savages by using specially refined and not so refined techniques I have developed. Image Enhancement II The spellchecker won't catch your incorrect and embarrassing use of "loose", "their", "weather" and other homonyms which immediately brand you as uneducated at best, and a lazy slob at worst. Let my proofreading keep up your good image - after all, what else do you have on a message board? P&L Statements The moment of truth has arrived - after taunting everyone with countless posts about 23 ES point days and living la vida loca, someone actually has the gall to ask to see a snapshot of your daily P&L. Your many attempts at evasion just increase the mob hysteria and soon some are even demanding monthly statements. The only way to salvage your credibility is to respect the wishes of your skeptical readers and post one of my custom made .gifs - you choose the broker, the instrument(s), the time period, the bottom line and I will provide you with a .gif whose authenticity would pass the scrutiny of a team of forensic accountants. Arbitration While there is nothing more humiliating than having your thread demoted to Chit Chat by rlb, or your post deleted by Magna, the knee-jerk reaction of a whining protest will not be effective - in fact it almost guarantees the action will not be reversed. Delegate me to use persuasive, behind the scenes communication, tempered with the right dosage of pandering, and chances are high that the relevant moderator will restore your missing post or thread, maybe even in its original format.
When I first started, I was making all these stupid posts going after marketsurfer and aphie but now I'm a legit and contributing member of ET. Mr. Subliminal's service helped me gain all the honor and respect I deserve. I must say all the Psychology posts Sub made for me were great! Mr. Subliminal works! Thank you Mr. Subliminal!
I've been feeling a touch guilty about smirking over Steves gaff. So in his defense I think we should note he only charges $9.99 for his e-book. Some start at $999 . Check out the recent classifieds http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/showthread.php?threadid=26494 one trader is trying to get $250 for a course he paid $5000 for.