(do you scrunch or fold your toilet paper?)

real men wipe their butts with sandpaper

 

do these men also have IQ's below 80?

 

I took a peek during our first kid. Never, EVER, under any circumstances, should a man be allowed to view the abomination of a birthing.

... nugget coming out of the asshole and the puss at the same time. Got the two mixed up and didn't know if that was a ball of sprouts from her nights dinner, or a Carrie-esque matt of blood and snot covered coif of my boys' head.

He's still curious about why he answers to "Shithead!" so readily.

 

C'mon. If you want to be Gordon Gekko, then wipe your ass like him.

<img src="http://www.amusei.com/images/ehow-wipe-your-ass1.jpg" />

 

speaking of wiping, how do you wipe your mind after a bout with ET.

 

Did you say Bill Gross?

I could make a suggestion to cure your problem but thats the advanced class, not available in stores or on the internet.

 

www.ratemypoo.com

Not for the faint of heart.