There's no arguing that saying you've quit a respected line of work to 'daytrade' is the same as saying 'I'm doing crypto'. In other words some people are thinking 'He went from a respectable profession to gambling. Can't wait to hear the failure story'. You can always give them Hyman Roth's line: "I'm a retired investor living on a pension" In all seriousness you're probably best off keeping it as general as possible. Not hard to do. It's nobody's business what your results are and the moment you feel pressured to show success it'll come back to bite you. Obviously in a family context it can be a more delicate matter, but you still need to decide how to handle this in advance. Bottom line you've chosen this line of endeavor and the only person who should care about your results is you. You've probably traded at this point long enough to understand that progress and PnL are not directly correlated. You can be making money and doing the wrong things, and vice versa. Trading is all about personal growth, and that takes focused time and experience. There is no way to explain that to one who hasn't been there. There are ultimately two outcomes: you either complete the steps you need to take to get the results you want, or you run out of time or interest. And that choice is yours to make. Don't make it about people who have no stake in the outcome.
Great advice. I'm gonna use the Hyman Roth line! Silly me, I thought I could tell my old friends what I'm actually up to and they'd hear me out. I've even gotten push back from some liberal friends about being involved in the markets at all.
This is really eye opening. It never occurred to me that I should just keep what I'm doing entirely to myself, but I totally see your point, given all the stupid reactions I've gotten. Guess I thought part of the commitment to trading was not being too secretive about it, but telling people just adds one more distraction. Gonna mull this over some more, but I think you're dead right.
You are not the only one. I HATE getting interrupted by other plans when trading. As traders, we need to monitor the prices closely, not exactly as close as scalpers but we need to monitor it close enough to be able to react to sudden movements or news quickly when necessarily. When we need to go to other engagements, it doesn't allow us to do that even if we have them mobile apps. It's annoying. The worst is when you have to go to those engagements where you have to wait. And then just when you need to put in a trade, you get called in. And then when you come out, you missed the opportunity. And you have to wait for the next day and you get a gap up/down and don't get to open/close the transaction at the price you want.
Other people's opinions and expectations have absolutely no place in your trading journey. There are numerous creative answers you can give, just be consistent. If you say things the right way most people will leave you alone. 'Immediate stakeholders', e.g. a spouse, is an entirely different matter. That requires a more thought out approach, and it may be wise to share articles by someone well spoken like Brett Steenbarger where he details the process of trader growth. That can really help build the right understanding so expectations are realistic (which also includes not promising the moon if this ends up working out). In a business where there are a lot of shady players trying to capitalize on desperation, it's very easy for an outsider to become a hardcore skeptic. You need to prove that you're not one of the many suckers who are looking for the magic shortcut, and if you share finances you need to draw clear lines about how much capital is being put at risk and how you will make things work out as you manage the learning curve. I know that's not what you asked about, but it's a good point for anyone who has this problem to consider in advance.
I also recommend Brett Steenbarger. And not just because he gives edge for free. https://traderfeed.blogspot.com/2006/10/tiki-dow-tick-and-program-trading.html
This has been super helpful. Hearing everybody's thoughts on this aspect of trading, I'm honestly surprised how naive I was on this point up til now. Glad I asked. Feel like I've joined some secret society all of a sudden
Think of the average person you encounter who is most likely working for someone else and would just love to have a job sitting anywhere in the world with a computer and making money watching price patterns, with nobody to answer to. Sounds like the dream job. So it's natural they'll be curious. Some will be genuinely happy for you and perhaps even wonder if they could do it (to which I always answer "stay away", as this will not deter the truly dedicated). Others will enjoy being skeptics and waiting to hear of your failure so they can feel happier about being stuck in their current situation. It's just the way people are. By the way the same thing applies for people who say they want to be writers, actors, musicians, etc. Anything that falls outside of the scope of standard employment or well established self employment routes and has a high failure rate. The vultures are waiting. As for those who are members of your household, that falls under the rubric of 'immediate stakeholders'. Not that you don't get the same emotions at work there, but you can't just shut them out of your life, unless you want to have conflict which will make it harder (maybe even impossible) for you to reach your goals. A quiet home front is a very big contributor to your success or failure. As for the neighborhood chatter, that's just street noise. Speaking of distractions, I took today off to take care of important business and I will also be most likely taking this week off for the same reason. There is no way I would have been able to focus on what I needed to do if today was a trading day. Yes, it was a good day with setups I like. Too bad. As someone said on this forum, "there is always another bus coming". I am working right now on building size and so I need maximal focus during market hours. But I will still give some time to study the day and review some previous charts. No reason I can't make time for that.