Damn It Feels Good to be Banker -- A Wall Street Musical

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by poyayan, Dec 13, 2008.

  1. poyayan


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    [Hot Dog Vendor]
    Bankers and Consultants, it's time to squash the beef
    Gonna settle this now
    Right here on the street

    M C.K. Prahalad (echoes)
    It's about to get weird...
    You bankers don't have a clue, better take some courses
    I'm on some Jedi mind sh*t, using all five forces
    Work hard, play hard even your mom thinks you're a tool
    Be a burnout banker, teaching math at my prep school
    I make sick decks
    I use the three C's -
    Chicks, Cash, Cristal, that's my only strategy
    You're playing with Excel doing nothing but grunt work
    I'm analyzing both qualitative AND quantitative research
    You slave away, another piece of the machine
    I make a really significant impact and get home by 7:15
    I work half the time you do, I know you must hate this
    Hold up... I'm about to put you in a two-by-two matrix
    I'm the star homey, your a*s is a cog
    You're in the lower-right quadrant but you still aint my dog
    (OH SH*T!)
    And I know something about you...
    You went to Walt Whitman - that's a PUBLIC SCHOOL!

    Hot Dog Vendor
    Oooh Sh****t! The consultant straight ripped it,
    Now let's see if the bankers can kick it.

    Button collar, Kenneth Coles.
    Sh*t son, your blackberry's like four year's old.
    While you're out mining for gold out in saskatchewan
    I'm going for bronze at the tanning salon
    You try to add value...I straight create it
    You get one sh*tty idea then take six months just to bake it.
    Still get paid in a recession, homey you know this.
    Where's the dow at? (11,000!)
    Still bigger than your bonus.
    I got a house in the Hamptons and a penthouse loft
    But you've got intangibles, is that why your skills are so soft?
    Over at 1OAK the bouncer looks at you sideways
    Get back to your roots, there's no line at TGI Friday's
    Hypothetical scenario: you get into the joint
    You still can't buy bottles with Starwood Points
    Free on nights and weekends with no discernable skill
    Not sure if you're a consultant or my cell phone bill
    Might work 100-hour weeks, barely sleep
    Do some blow off my desk when I'm eight red bulls deep
    Compared to what you do, my job's a challenge
    I like my bank roll, bro
    This is Wall St., b#$*h, you don't belong here
    I'm your greatest fear, the sh*t you wish you could be
    but are two weak to get near
    Is it starting to make sense?
    Is it starting to come clear?
    Take this mouse and get back to making $60K a year

    Hot Dog Vendor
    That's not a lot of money,
    We found out who's the real gangster, sing it with me now
    Damn it Feels Good to Be a Banker
    Oh Oh Oh!
    Damn it feels good go be a banker.
  2. poyayan


    "straight create value". More like taking a commission by shifting shit to taxpayers.