Conservative History of United States

Discussion in 'Politics' started by claywilk, Aug 20, 2006.

  1. 1776 - Crazed Liberals are trying to overthrow the King. God save the King!

    1803-Damn Liberals overhtrew the Alien and Sedition Acts that allowed us to monitor Americans and expell them if they didnt love america.

    1861- Damn liberals believe they have the right to "secure these Rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just Powers from the Consent of the Governed, that whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these Ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its Foundation on such Principles, and organizing its Powers in such Form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness."

    Lets invade them and show them that is bullshit!

    1917- Damn Liberals want to get us into World War. We do business with these countries.

    1935- Damn Liberals want to install Social Security. This will destroy the country.

    1941- Damn Liberals want us to get into World War II. AGAINST the Nazis of all things.

    1944- Damn Liberals want to create the GI Bill. We can't afford this, it will kill the country.

    1945- Damn Liberals want to rebuild Germany and Japan. We can't afford this, it will kill the country.

    1953- better weasel out of the Korean War the damn liberals got us into

    1969- Our glorious leader embarks on detente, agreeing to sell important technology to our sworn enemies to get them to like us.

    1972- Our glorious leader made friends with the Great Leader of China.

    1973- better weasel out of the war in Vietnam the damn liberals got us into

    1979- Damn weak ass liberal Carter tried to save the hostages in Iran

    1981- Our glorious Strong leader negotiated with terrorists and got our hostages back

    1982- Our glorious leader had the foresight to deregulate the Savings and Loan industry. The 150 billion dollar bailout was a small price to pay for the gains in efficiency.

    1983- Our glorious leader got our troops out of harms way in Lebanon after getting only 241 Americans killed. And he had the foresight not to attack the roots of Hezbollah. Hail Ronnie!

    1983- Our brave forces led by our glorious leader invaded the great nation of Granada and freed it from the six cubans who were holding it hostage!

    1986- Our glorious leader had the foresight to sell arms to our sworn enemies in order to illegally fund a rogue army and its death squads fighting for freedom.

    1990- Our glorious leader had the foresight to contain Saddam hussein for the strategic interests of the United States.

    1996- Damn Liberal is getting blowjobs in the White House. We should impeach him!

    2003- Our glorious leader decided to eliminate Saddam Hussein despite the important role he played as a non-theocratic government in the region.

    2006- Our glorious leader declares that we cannot weasel out of this war because our glorious Eisenhower weaseled out of Korea, the glorious Nixon weaseled out of Vietnam, and the glorious Reagan weaseled out of Lebanon. We cannot send that message again.

    2006- Just like in 1803 the liberals are trying to keep us from monitoring Americans to find out which one of them dont love america.
  2. You should'nt 'diss the glorious leader, dude.

    He's an ok guy.