Go Chuck! <object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/z2XUgE6g7XU&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/z2XUgE6g7XU&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>
The last time your platform went down, it was not due to a technical issue. Chuck Norris was seen on the company parking lot and everyone scrammed...even the automated machines took off... Chuck Norris only visits you for one reason......to kill you
The average person is assigned for all short options expiring within .05 ITM by market close on expiration day. Chuck Norris goes through the same process. Except it only applies to options over $50 ITM. Expiration day does not apply to him. Chuck Norris NEVER gets assigned.
The world is not going through a food crisis because of speculation. Chuck Norris simply had a larger breakfast than usual.
One time Chuck Norris took a loss on a trade so he round house kicked it....a loss has never showed up again.
I know this one isn't stock related, but its my favorite: Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris