Honestly, if he fucked his couch at 18 I don't think it would be a big deal. Now, if he was fantasizing about a couch instead of using it as a tool to masturbate that would be very strange.
Leave JD alone. Every boy needs a hobby. Imagine the trouble he would have gotten himself into had he not "released" all that pent up energy. Yes, I know the story is bullshit, but the entertainment value was too much to ignore. Squeal like a pig JD, squeal boy. Rheeeeeee