Bear Stearn`s Dear Investor letter explained From Greg Newtonâs blog: A day late and several hundred million dollars short, Bear Stearns did its sort-of âsplaininâ about the adventures of its credit strategies funds, servinâ a heapinâ helpinâ of the strangulated verbal stylings reserved for these occasions. Some key sentences, translated: The preliminary estimates show there is effectively no value left for the investors in the Enhanced Leverage Fund and very little value left for the investors in the High-Grade Fund as of June 30 2007. Translation: Youâre screwed. At this time approximately $1.4 billion remains outstanding on this [$1.6 billion] line and we continue to believe there are sufficient assets available in the High-Grade fund to fully collateralize the repo facility. Translation: Weâre not. i>In the past weeks, Bear Stearns has taken action to restore investor confidence [blah blah blah] extra layer of oversight [blah blah blah] hedge fund risk management function [blah blah blah]... Translation: We faxed Ralphi Cioffiâs resume to (403) 217-2470.â Our highest priority is to continue to earn your trust and confidence each and every day, consistent with the Firmâs proud history of achievement. Translation: Thanks for playing. Please enjoy the rest of your evening. Source :http://nakedshorts.typepad.com/nakedshorts/2007/07/translating-bss.html HA, HA, HA....Good laugh