I am glad that I know the truth, which is that everything you have typed above is irrelevant, because we do not exist after our personality dies. This is the singular-most important point anyone that is alive needs to realize... Dudes! When you lose consciousness and do not wake up again, yer no longer! Hello! You don't have a fucking "soul". There is no more YOU! When you go to sleep tonight, try to remember it! You cannot! It is impossible! Because you have no consciousness at that moment! OMG people are so fucking silly.
Well this is one of the attitudes that caused you to descend from heaven to arrive here in hell. Well, what arrives in hell is a pseudo alternative of what actually begins to descend. What arrives is a substitute self, not a real self. You anchor and ground your experience deeper into hell the more real you make the fake self. The true Self, Christ, does not die. By claiming that Christ does die, you merely arrive into an experience where circumstances seem to prove it to be true. So long as you think this way, those circumstances will remain overwhelming.
There is no self outside of the construct of physical reality. There is no "soul". There is no " substitute self". I have been thinking about this every night for years, and I know the truth. Dead relatives not coming back to assuage anguish, dead friends not saying hello, and the simple facts of the physical universe lead me to the true knowledge of what the deal is. There is nothing beyond this physical existence. Face the facts...You are unique, but you are singular and unimportant, and have no further existence past your own consciousness.
Well hell is a terrible feedback loop. And, if we keep thinking the way we've always thought, we'll keep getting what we've always got. This way, hell could get more and more perilous the longer we tarry. You've no idea how much slippery slope solipsism has infected your mind. First of all, nothing "physical" is real. If you say so, then fine, let your own chains be tightened, and may your chains be anchored to the earth forever...if that were possible. Solipsism is fine, if applied to the true Self, or what I call 'Christ'. As soon as you start applying the characteristics and circumstances belonging to Christ to the fake self that substitutes for Christ, then you are in for a world of hurt. Nothing exists outside Christ's consciousness. To apply this characteristic to the fake self only reinforces the effects of hell upon it. That is not a punishment. Blasphemy has effects. I would remind all, that blasphemy is against the Self, while the effect of the blasphemy is against the substitutes for the Self. Yes, all of the substitutes are unique. This is one of the attitudes that has caused you to descend from heaven, into hell. In heaven, Christ is NOT unique, being equal to anything that actually exists. There is no such thing as unique. So, this is how you know you're still experiencing hell as a feedback loop: if you look around and see unique individuals. If dead relatives don't stop by to say hello it's only more evidence of what you say, that death is the truth. Sad, but not proof. Circumstantial. Overwhelming. But not true. But let's not be confused, if a relative did stop to say hello after the long sleep, it still does not mean that they exist as a self apart from Christ...nor you apart from Christ. It can mean that between reincarnations we are semi-cognizant of earlier personalities that we portrayed, when we substituted for Christ. Just because unique individuals reincarnate, it does not mean that the incarnated are actually alive. Life is a characteristic belonging only to Christ, and it is dangerous to claim it for the substitutes, even briefly. As a rule of thumb: What can die was never alive to begin with.
An obvious question is what flock can believe in itself when it has guys like OP in the club ? I didn't really think guys like him would qualify for membership but he thinks some God would condone the way he carries himself in life.
Historical research has shown how the writings of the bible were developed over 100s of years from a simple story of a itinerant Jewish preacher (one of many during that time) who merely asked people to follow the Jewish religion of that time. Jesus just happened to be in the right place and right time to be crucified, martyred, and made famous, while "Christ" was written in later. Almost all of bible stories were pulled from pagan and Jewish myths of the surrounding regions or written as fiction much later. There is some wisdom in the bible but it is foolish to take it literally. I do like to attend the occasional Orthodox Liturgy which are closer to the pagan/Hindu/Buddhist root of Christianity (as well as Islam and modern Judaism). Heaven and Hell are better understood as existing during earthly life. I practice Jnana Yoga and meditation to diminish my internal purgatory and reveal heaven on earth. What happens after death is not my concern. I like the idea of reincarnation, but more likely outside of consciousness/language there is no-thing (which is disappearance of the languaging/idea of presence and absence and all other language/consciousness dualisms).
Religion when one is indoctrinated during childhood is hard to give up or change. I was lucky enough to have a religious epiphany when I was 22 that Christianity was human-derived fiction, that obliterated the religious brainwashing, and allowed me to later discover Yoga/Buddhism practices which work better for me spiritually. There are authentic Bhakti (Devotional) Yogi practitioners who use Christianity as a base of practice and a few who reach enlightenment, but many others need a more empirical methodology for cleansing the doors of perception. It's all ultimately fiction, but some fictions are better at setting up spiritual ladders than others. Absolutist literalism and religious defensiveness are a great way to get stuck spiritually.
Through meditative practices you can become aware during deep dreamless sleep, just as you can develop lucid dreaming abilities. Saying nothing exists after death is just as much belief as saying something exists which is why for me agnosticism is the only honest belief system. I profoundly don't know. There are supposedly some awakened humans who do (or did) know what happens after death, but I do no personally know whether they are telling the truth or not. Jesus was not one of those, unless the eastern stories about his going to India and Tibet are true (where he supposedly achieved enlightenment); personally I think these were most likely made up like all the rest of the Jesus stories.
"The real does not die, the unreal never lived." - Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj. There is a lot of wisdom in what you write; if you remove "Christ" from your writing you are in alignment with many of the world's spiritual traditions. Particularly, Hinduism and Buddhism. But then Christianity's origins (through its old testament writings and early new testament writings that were added during the first couple of hundred years after Jesus died) are intertwined with the east as can be seen by attending any traditional Orthodox Liturgy.