Al Gore Reverses Course, Now Warns Of Global Cooling

Discussion in 'Politics & Religion' started by bugscoe, Jul 1, 2010.

  1. Last Night On Larry King Live: Feeling Some Heat, Al Gore Reverses Course, Now Warns Of Global Cooling
    Posted by Steve Grammatico Jul 1st 2010 at 5:52 am

    Also appearing on the show with Mr. Gore was the new head of the U. N.’s climate panel, Sucrose Sucrose-Ghali, sister of former U. N. General Secretary Boutros Boutros-Ghali. Both she and Gore acknowledged that global warming has been exposed as a sophisticated hoax perpetrated by several now-discredited climatologists. “The scientists responsible were vested in trying to prove something that wasn’t so in order to secure grants and garner honors and fame,” Boutros-Ghali said. “They assumed they’d never be found out. Shows what they know.”

    In a startling reversal, Gore claimed that global cooling, not global warming, is really the greatest threat mankind faces. “The most recent reliable data suggest earth is actually heading into a Little Ice Age caused mainly by human activity. We now believe nuclear weapons testing in the latter half of the 20th century, particularly by the United States, shifted the planet on its axis, exposing less of the surface to the sun’s rays.”

    Other reasons for the cooling earth, Gore added: “Widespread use of refrigerators, freezers, and air conditioners. They have become ubiquitous over the last fifty years, even in remote areas. Every time someone peeks in the fridge to see what’s in there, every time someone cranks up the AC, cold air escapes and temperatures decline worldwide. The result: falling sea levels as more and more water becomes locked up in polar caps and glaciers. That means less rain and, eventually, drought, famine, pestilence and a whole host of Biblical plagues.”

    What to do? For a start, Boutros-Ghali suggested that everyone see Gore’s new feature documentary, An Inconvenient Truth II: This Time I’m Right. “To slow planetary cooling, Mr. Gore offers common-sense solutions, such as giving tax breaks for SUV purchases; burning more coal; revoking the ban on CFC compounds [found in aerosol spray propellants and AC units] to open holes in the ozone layer, allowing more solar radiation to reach the earth; and firing the Amazon rain forest, creating particulate barriers in the stratosphere to keep heat from escaping into space.”

    The former vice president recently founded “Cooler Heads International, LLC, Ontario (CHILLCO), a Canadian-based firm which invests institutional funds in global warming technologies and concepts designed to combat global cooling.

    Sucrose-Ghali promised the U. N. would lobby the world community to declare cattle and termites protected species:

    Band-aid measures for the short term? The former veep is pessimistic: “Our planet is sick, Larry. Mankind is the tapeworm in its gut. I am the doctor. My prescription: we eliminate the tapeworm to save the patient. I’d like birth rates at zero in fifty years, humans extinct a hundred years after that. That’s the only way we’re going to win this one. We can’t hide the decline any more, so let’s just get this over with.”
     
  2. This article is asinine.

    Where is it from, The Onion?
     
  3. Lol. What a story. :D I wish you posted the source as well.:D
     
  4. nursebee

    nursebee

    Algore is just massaging this rising temperature story for all it is worth. Why don't he just sit in a corner and rub his own buddha belly instead of asking for a Harry Reasoner like retirement? It's time someone lifted the sheet of secrecy off this fella...
     
  5. ==============
    Bugs, nickname;

    Great quote''Cooler Heads Intl''LOL:D

    I saw a1970's documentary several years ago;
    global cooling/media scare, it was a bit scary,LOL:D ,
    because a Canadian River which had never froze, it froze the same year of the ''cool scare.LOL:cool: Cool.

    And then showed in Europe.... how the temps had cooled in the dark ages.. Then showed how much Greenland cooled /goofed up the Vikings big time...
     
  6. TGregg

    TGregg

    Nukes? LOL, no it was Algore's fat head that shifted the entire planet.