For those interested in the details, I will be publishing a paper in the Annals of the American Journal of Abnormal Trading Psychology. Following is a first draft of the abstract. It is well known that intraday trading of stock index futures induces, exacerbates or exaggerates Multiple Personality Disorder in susceptible individuals (see Deco; Mudgins; Kraepelin). For nine years I have been treating an extraordinary case of Trading-Induced MPD, let us call him "Hypo", a corruption of the name of his favorite Marx brother. At times this eloquent and persuasive patient almost dragged me into his psychoses, reinforced by the belief of his on-line correspondents, but I persevered and now this patient, with a record number of nineteen personalities, is whole. Unfortunately, the result of this mental enema is that we buried his remains in a thimble this morning. It turns out that no one was home. His entire existence depended on mentally juggling multiple personality balls. As a caution to my peers, always make sure your clients are current on their accounts, as you never know what might happen to them as a result of your otherwise well-intended ministrations.