If any of you uncommitted psychotic traders out there are wondering why you haven't heard from ET's primo psycho lately, it's because we here at the PTI (Psychotic Trading Institute) have him so tripped out that he can't even spell ET. It took a cocktail of antipsychotics that would shut up even Jack to do it. Or so I thought.
When I went on rounds to his elegantly padded cell, he leapt up like the maniac that he is, grabbed me in a bear hug (it's that kind of a market now, better that than a bull tupp), kissed me, and expectorated into my mouth a partially-metabolized antipsychotic spittle. For those of you who might find this hypoerotic, let me assure you that it was anything but for me. I know that the cocktail I prescribed has a paradoxical effect on the sane. So I'm in for a long night where reality is indistinguishable from fantasy. Sort of like daytrading.
I swooned, and the next thing I knew, I was immobilized in my office chair looking at a one-second chart of NQ. "You see that, Doc?" he slobbered maniacally. "It's proof positive that the market is a bitch! You're nice to her, she cuts your balls off! You're mean to her, she loves you!" I fainted, but not before I had the presence of mind to hit shift-Prt Sc. Chart to follow. But not until the first shift orderlies rescue me. Until then I am spooning with a delusional drooling psycho-trader. The lamb may lie down with the lion, but the lamb won't get much sleep.
Whew! Rescued at last! We trank our patients at night because we can't stand being in their heads 24/7. Hardly a day goes by that I don't curse ET for contributing so conspicuously to the community mental health load. Hopeful newbies go there seeking clarity, but eventually concerned family members bring them to me. Invariably the symptom is the same, their speech has deteriorated into a schizoid word salad: "Channel jokari two pair failure dry up point one gaussian rocket crayola iceberg taping slalom traverse squeeze."
The prognosis is rarely good. What I heard all night was variants on "Doc, there's a code in the chart! Clues everywhere! In repeating patterns! Look, there's another one! Where do you keep your crayons?" After watching that maniac chart all night I was beginning to see things myself. I'm working on an analysis of the particularly intriguing chart snippet attached.