Jokes 2

I always try to help the girls in my office who are feeling down, by feeling them up.

 

The French army have apparently entered Timbuktu.

Nobody knows who or where they were running from.

 

I, uh, I mean Maybe, well if......... Aw, forget it.

 

Friend of mine from Boston said he lost his khakis. Couldn't come to work.

Can't get car started.

 

Since Barney Frank retired from congress, he's looking for a new line of work and is thinking about window installation.
Says he likes working with caulk.

 

I'm going to run a 3K race this weekend to raise awareness of the Klan.

 

Wrt Modern English

A noted linguistics professor from Oxford, visiting Harvard for a semester, was giving his inaugural lecture one day in early September in front of most Harvard top brass and his incoming class.

'In our language', he said in deep aristocratic English accent, 'A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is NO language wherein a double positive can form a negative!'

A rudely loud voice from the back of the room piped up: 'Yeah, right...' !!!

 

Good Question

So, if love is blind, is marriage an eye opener?

 

Love is blind. Hate is deaf.

You would think Stupid would be mute, but I just keep talking.